On My Own.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

This week on the Equals Record: thoughts on spending time alone...


...as always, here's an excerpt from the new post: I get the feeling that being on my own, much like many other aspects of getting older, is something I’ll get better at with time. Right now, I’m perfectly happy to shop alone, cook alone, watch movies alone, jog alone (how anyone can run and hold a conversation at the same time is beyond me anyway). But there are certain activities I’m not sure I’d be brave enough to attempt solo: going to dinner at a nice restaurant, for example. Or spending a weekend away. I love the idea of these things, but I know I’d feel self-conscious—and maybe a little lonely—if it actually came to doing them.

See the rest at the Equals Record, here. Thanks so much for reading!

PS: That's me in the photo above, wearing this yellow polka-dot dress. (It's one of my favorites.)

24 comments:

SreeBindu said...

love the simple look :)
xo

EVA MART├ŹNEZ said...

Shoko, I simply love your blog, you inspire me!!! I posted about this same issue in my own blog a few weeks ago, I just started writting it but I´m really enjoying it.
Greetings from Spain :)

rebecca said...

always enjoy your words. :)

leaf (the indolent cook) said...

I actually really like my alone time. Before I coupled up, I went on a couple of interstate weekend breaks by myself, which were lovely. It was "me" time though I also met up with some internet friends whilst on those trips, which was great. And I've had dinner by myself at nice restaurants (this tends to happen on said weekends away, as a treat!).

I note that you're a freelancer though so I can see why you might feel a bit lonely sometimes. If that's the case, find something with a strong sense of community, that you have an interest in, and get involved. When I took up martial arts I met so many new people who became a regular part of my life.

P.S. You look gorgeous in that photo!

Rachel said...

I very much enjoy my time alone. It's nice being the one that gets to call the shots. But I like you worry about doing those things. I love seeing new movies but can't bring myself to go to the theater alone.

hannah margaret said...

That shade of yellow is my favorite color ever. It epitomizes being cheerful, in my opinion. So a dress in that shade is primo. AND, your post on Equals Record was fab. I commented there.

xoxo, hm

Ruth Martin said...

I hope I never get to the eating out and holidaying alone stage! But I do like to be out and about by myself, whether running or walking, I like the space adn time to be with your thoughts. Even for a short while.
Also nice photo, good composition

angela said...

Love your article, I agree with you- eating out alone has never been my favorite thing. When I was single I really enjoyed my alone time, but now that I live with my boyfriend I can't imagine him not being there.. I guess it's just different for different stages of your life.

Kathy said...

Relevant and relatable, as always :)
Also, I love that yellow dress and that you have paired it with red tights! Such a happy combo!

Melissa said...

Another great article, Shoko! Thanks so much for sharing that video. It was sweet and inspiring. There are pros and cons to being with or without a companion and we shouldn't look at being alone as just killing time until you "find someone". Loneliness can be a drag but being able to enjoy the quietness of your own thoughts is incredible sometimes. Keep up the good work!

Lisa said...

Loved and left a (very long - sorry!) comment on the Equals Record. Your words are so inspiring!

April said...

I love this excerpt. I really enjoy being alone, and a friend of mine and I have a saying, "there are worst things than being alone." I really want to take a trip by myself, well actually with my dog! Which feels a little more secure. haha

Dad said...

you're a treasure. xxoo

Jennifer Young said...

you look so cute in all that color! heading over to read your goodness. i am a big fan of alone time...

Samantha said...

love this article! I can relate to the concept so so much. You have a lovely blog! :)

xo, samantha
sammyblackwood.com

Shoko said...

Eva, thank you so much! Means the world to me. Can't wait to check out your blog!

Leaf, thank you! And that's great advice. From time to time, I'll take a class or enroll in some sort of workshop, but I'd love to get involved with something more consistent.

April, do it! I'm sure you'd have an amazing time!

Samantha, thank you! So, so happy you like it.

Lisa said...

That's so funny you posted about about dining alone in a restaurant. I was just reminiscing today about how it's natural to sit by yourself at a restaurant or cafe in Paris. It's almost like a national pass-time! Being alone there is such a loaded statement (and Parisians love that! I lived there for 4 years and that's the feeling I got :) In Paris, I think dining alone could mean a) you're waiting for someone that you either know...or don't know (quel scandale!) b) the city is your dining room and you hate cooking c) you're the confident observer and love nothing more than drinking in the drama and fashion d) you've been at that table since the afternoon and it's time for a plate of charcuterie and cheeses! Anyway, thanks for the lovely posts. Lisa x

cicilia said...

I love this post. I could totally relate. Been there before. And your words are so moving, I am a fan! :)

Lisa said...

Shoko, I just love the post you shared on the Equals Record. I also love your yellow dress. Have you seen fantastic mr. fox? The dress reminds me of the dress Mrs. Fox wears. So pretty.

Shoko said...

Thank you so much, everyone! Your support means the world to me.

Heather said...

Love the post, Shoko! And I can definitely relate--I'm also at a point in my life where I have lots of alone time. But I've learned to make the most of it and really enjoy it. I've found that the best thing is to try all the things that seem a little scary--like dining out solo at a nice restaurant. After doing it once, you realize how fun (and empowering) it feels! :)

Mel Scouts said...

Right on point Shoko! I enjoy my moments alone but definitely feel like there is a 'time limit' before I need some interaction.

When my husband's away for the weekend, I feel the need to plan out my full weekend to prevent myself from being stir crazy within the four walls of my little house.

I'm definitely trying hard to work on it. :)

L▲UR▲ said...

Hi Shoko, I got to read your posts at Equals Record and here through another blogger. I am LOVING your work, you're an inspiration!

This one is such a great article and definitely fitting in with my current situation and could relate to it so thanks so much for bringing this up. I'm single and recently turned 30 and yes, most of my friends are either in long relationship or with family. I'm too most of the time have no problem enjoying the time I spend by myself, I love going shopping by myself. And at times I do prefer to go to art galleries, museums or enjoy the day at the beach by myself. Like you though, a fancy dinner or travelling by myself is something that I've never done before. I once had to go to a wedding and I did get pretty anxious about going solo. I knew 2 of my friends will be there, but they were going with their partner, husband and little one. You don't know how relieved I was to find out another friend of mine going solo and asked if I wanted to go together! Turned out I met few other people who were also going solo, it gives me some comfort feeling that I wasn't the only one!

I'm really glad to know that I'm not the only one on this situation. I really want to learn to enjoy the moment as much as I can and not try to get this kind of thing to get in the way and I hope (for myself and everyone else who's at the same stage) together we can do this. Yes, on some circumstances it could be awkward and uncomfortable, but reading all the comments here it really encourages me to just do and not overthink things. Looks like it's worth a try and would be a liberating experience in the end.

Did you end up doing any new solo adventure? If so would be very keen to read a follow up post on how you went :)

Shoko said...

Thank you so much for such a thoughtful comment and such kind words, Laura! You're right, a follow-up post is much-needed - while I haven't gone on any major adventures solo, I do have quite a few stories about some smaller ones :)

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
 

sho & tell © All rights reserved · Theme by Blog Milk · Blogger